Lifelong Impact: The Stories of Friends Who Shaped my Personal and Professional journey"

 

In  this BLOG, I want to share the inspiring stories of friends who have profoundly impacted my life. The primary motivation behind this blog is my firm belief in the importance of complete transparency about my journey, the obstacles I faced, and how I emerged on the other side of those challenges. Moreover, I wish to seize this opportunity to establish a foundation for you to gain a deeper understanding of who I am and the things I care about before I delve into discussing particular subjects that captivate my attention. 

While success can be a highly subjective concept, what I refer to as success here is my personal journey from a point where circumstances could have taken a turn for the worse, and the individuals who played a significant role in my path.   

While it's an undeniable fact that my personal and professional development owes gratitude to more people, these individuals stand out. To my friends who aren't mentioned on this list, please don't feel disheartened, for you occupy a cherished corner in my heart. Your presence is vivid in my memory, and your significance in my life is treasured. I will continue to update this blog, and as I recall more chapters of my journey, additional people and groups will undoubtedly emerge. Moreover, I have other blog posts in the works that will explore various stories involving the people with whom I've shared this remarkable life.

My Mother

A little background: My sister and I are the only children of our mother. ,She encountered complications while giving birth, resulting in the loss of a few potential siblings. I, myself, was born prematurely through a cesarean operation during the seventh month of her pregnancy. This history forms a deep connection that goes beyond the ordinary reasons for her strong affection towards us, her only surviving children.

Let me start and share the tale of how she played a pivotal role in reshaping my early-stage life. She was the one who consistently rose at the break of dawn, around five in the morning. This was the time when the radio station, Radio Free Africa, would play these particular two songs called "Amka Kumekucha by Maroon Comandos and 5 O’clock by T-PAIN” in its tune echoing reminder that it’s time to wake up. I hope some of you can remember these songs. Even now, the echoes of these songs linger in my ears, transporting me back to those wonderful days. 

It's amusing how, at that time, I was reluctant to rise early for school. Such is life; I reflect on these memories and ponder why I felt so unwilling when, in reality, it was all for our future. I can't blame myself; after all, I was just a kid who likely preferred to relax. You might understand this better when you consider that I had to walk at least 4 kilometers to school at such a young age. On top of that, I had to spend many hours at school, and my only option for lunch was a cup of porridge. This was a shared reality for many of you who experienced a similar educational background as mine.

Each morning, my mother would meticulously prepare breakfast, even during times when our choices were scarce. Her dedication was vividly expressed through her insistence on ensuring I had a simple cup of tea to kickstart my day.

I can't remember precisely, of course, but I was told the picture on the left was taken between 1995 and 96. The one on the left was taken in 2018

 There were days when school didn't hold its attraction to me, specifically Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays. The rationale behind this has faded from my memory. These were the days I would conceal myself amidst the bushes, patiently waiting until my fellow students made their way to school. I would then blend in with them going back home, a covert act that escaped my parents' notice, as I managed to return home at the regular time when school was over.

I distinctly recall one incident that stands out. If my former classmates were to read this and remember that day, I'm certain they'd be chuckling heartily. It was the day when a giant mathematics teacher, who was usually scared by pupils, decided to discipline me using bamboo sticks. The striking thing was that he struck me a total of 21 times on my backside. This still hurts until today. Surprisingly, this stern lesson didn't have the intended effect of altering my behaviour. In fact, a week later, I found myself falling back into the same pattern of skipping school, despite the pain from the bamboo sticks. This is why I don't believe that physical punishment, like sticks, can genuinely enhance children's behavior, as it didn't work for me. However, I acknowledge that this is a debatable topic within the culture I come from.

Amidst these trials, my mother and stepfather radiated enthusiasm for school. Yet, for me, the prospect of attending school seemed bleak. A transition was imminent, though the details of that shift are reserved for another time. As time marched forward, change gradually became evident. I moved from being an unwilling student to embracing a love for learning, a shift that ultimately defined me. This is in stark contrast to my past, a past where my story was entirely different. Indeed, the essence of our survival as humans lies in our ability to constantly evolve, whether in positive or negative directions. It all hinges on the motivation behind the choices we make. The beauty of life lies in its capacity to reshape our perspectives, transforming us from a negative outlook to a positive one. 

During my primary school years, I shared a profound closeness with my mother. However, as I transitioned to secondary school, geographical distance separated us, altering the dynamics of our relationship.

This journey, from morning melodies to the sting of bamboo, encapsulates the essence of life's molding forces. It's through challenges that our character takes shape, perspectives evolve, and we undergo transformative growth."

 

Baraka Kitua

Let me introduce you to a very good friend, Baraka Kitua. This friend and I first crossed paths during our undergraduate studies in BSc Environmental Studies at Teofilo Kisanji University in Mbeya, Tanzania. We lived in the same small place, often squeezed into a single bedroom due to less funds. But even though life was tough, it had its own meaning. Some days, finances were tight, and our meals depended on what little cash we had in our pockets. I remember how much we enjoyed eating locally made cassava and salad "KACHUMBALI." It wasn't about being fancy; but because beans were within our means. During those times, a plate of cassava and some salad cost just five hundred Tanzanian shillings, and that was about it for the day mean.  

Growing up without a brother was a unique experience, but it was Bakara Kitua who filled that role and taught me the essence of being a good and caring brother. He was the kind of person who not only listened to my problems but also took them on as his own. Every interaction with him was a vivid reminder of the value of companionship and brotherhood. Those moments spent with Bakara were not just ordinary; they were infused with a sense of liveliness and deep connection that I cherished.

Despite our many shared interests, what truly stood out for both me and Baraka was our common love for musicians Adele and Eminem. Adele's debut studio album "19" held a special place in our hearts, teaching us the power of emotional singing. Songs like "Make You Feel My Love" and "Chasing Pavements" had a significant impact, offering solace even after tiring days of classes. I can still sing the lyrics from "Chasing Pavements":

I've made up my mind
Don't need to think it over
If I'm wrong, I am right
Don't need to look no further
This ain't lust
I know this is love, but

If I tell the world
I'll never say enough
'Cause it was not said to you
And that's exactly what I need to do
If I end up with you

 For those familiar with Eminem's first album, "Curtain Call: The Hits" (2005), the song "When I'm Gone" held a special place for us; I still consider it our jam. We were a bit unique—jamming to Eminem's tunes and then switching to Adele might seem odd, but it was a testament to our diverse interests. It showed that we cared and sometimes didn't care too much at the same time. 

During our second year, Baraka made a bold decision to take up a job at Kilimanjaro International Airport, a choice that involved risks to his studies. However, looking back, I believe it was the right decision for him at that time. After two years, Baraka returned to university to complete his studies. 

It was Baraka who extended an invitation for me to come to Arusha after I finished my undergraduate degree. At that point, I had no impressive work experience to speak of. This situation resonates with many of us who lack familial networks to secure job opportunities on our behalf. I am eagerly excited as I look forward to discussing in my next journal how I managed to overcome the challenge of not having work experience, leading me to qualify, study, and work in an international setting.

It was a friend like Baraka who trusted me and welcomed me to live with him, even when I had no job prospects. Such gestures can only be made by true friends. I take immense pride in individuals like Baraka and many others who exhibit this level of kindness. It serves as a shining example of the type of compassion we need more of in the world.

Baraka is the reason I have such a deep connection to this city of Arusha. My journey and beginnings in Arusha are intricately linked to this true friend. He's a lifelong friend, someone I share a deep connection with that only he and I truly understand. That's the extent of what I can share; the rest of our profound bond remains beyond words."

 

Charles Shachinda

Our paths converged in the United Kingdom during our pursuit of an MSc in Water Supply, Sanitation, and Health Engineering at the University of Leeds. The year 2020 witnessed the global upheaval due to the COVID-19 pandemic, forcing a transition to online classes and widespread closures.

I recall the inception of our connection. Immediately following our initial online class, Charles reached out through WhatsApp, sparking a conversation that extended for nearly an hour. His charismatic persona and eloquence in public speaking left an indelible imprint. What resonated deeply with me was Charles's unwavering determination to excel and achieve extraordinary feats. His intellectual prowess is remarkable, proficient in six languages, three of which are international.  

Charles and I both graduated with distinctions from the University of Leeds' MSc program in Water Supply, Sanitation, and Health Engineering. Our journey into the UK's academic realm was initiated through this master's course, marked by a formidable initial challenge. The inaugural assignment, pertaining to the Management of Water, Sanitation, and Hygiene (WaSH) projects, presented an uphill struggle for me. I recall receiving a 'C' grade on this task, owing partly to misunderstanding the instructions and unfamiliarity with the resources. For those familiar with my character, I am inherently driven towards achieving excellence, and I hold a deep sense of pride in the quality of my work. Consequently, this particular assignment posed a significant challenge for me. I opted for vulnerability and sought help from Charles and Jay, a mutual friend. Their response was a testament to their character, as they not only refrained from judgment but also guided me on accessing resources and researching online. This marked the turning point in my learning journey. With resolute dedication, subsequent assignments led me to achieve an overall 'A' grade. 

In the left photo, from right to left, you can see Jay, Charles, and me, taken in Leeds. On the right, we were in Sheffield.

 Beyond the classroom, Charles and I formed a dynamic duo, along with our other friends. Exploring the UK, traversing its cities, and immersing ourselves in its cultural tapestry. Our favored destination was London, particularly Trafford's Westfield. Together, we created an engaging synergy, forging new connections and enriching our social circles. 

                 


Our professional journey transcended university boundaries. Presently, Charles serves as a Technical Officer at the International Forum for British Water Company, responsible for stakeholder engagement and program delivery. Concurrently, I hold the position of Regional Program Manager at eWater Services. Our commitment to growth remains unwavering, evident in our participation in various learning opportunities. Both of us have ventured to the United States under distinct programs and at different time. Charles attended the UN Water Conference through the IWA-Grundfos Young Water Professional Program, while I participated under the Mandela Washington Fellowship. Our pursuit of professional growth aligns, with the recent publication of a collaborative academic paper in the Journal of Water, Sanitation, and Hygiene, published by the International Water Association. ‘WaSH Futurism’: exploring post-SDG6 targets using the Nominal Group Technique for more equitable global agenda setting

An Instagram post shared by a friend profoundly resonates with me, and I hope it resonate with you too: 

Our social networks influence our neurological pathways through specialized brain cells known as ‘mirror neurons,’ enabling us to learn and empathize by observing others. Surrounding ourselves with positive and uplifting individuals and ideas can expose us to favorable experiences and outcomes. Remember to W.A.T.C.H. Who you spend your time with as they undoubtedly affect your Words, Actions, Thoughts, Characters, and Habits."

 Conscious and intentional, I have nurtured relationships that contribute to my growth. Quality supersedes quantity, focusing on individuals whose impact resonates in both my personal and professional spheres. The reality is that alignment with everyone is not imperative; diverse interests naturally guide us. 

 Prioritizing who we invest our time with is an act of self-respect. Surrounding ourselves with talented friends who hold us accountable is essential, not those who silently watch our bad habits take their toll just for amusement. Conversely, it's equally important to bear in mind that highly talented individuals with questionable values can inflict more harm upon us than righteous individuals with lesser talents. I choose to keep genuine friends close, always, regardless of their intellectual abilities. Determining who isn't a genuine friend can indeed be a challenging task. However, it's essential not to dwell on this concern too much because, ultimately, people tend to reveal their true selves over time. Simply allow them the space and time to do so. No one can maintain a mask indefinitely, and authenticity will eventually shine through. Those who leave when you stand up for yourself, protect your boundaries, and embrace growth were never meant to be a lasting part of your journey.

Charles Shachinda embodies the essence of a friend, mentor, and collaborator, propelling my journey towards excellence. Our shared aspirations, accomplishments, and camaraderie exemplify the potential of cultivating meaningful relationships. As we chart our course forward, our shared impact in the global water sector is a vision eagerly anticipated.

 

Raleigh International-Volunteers on Water, Sanitation, and Hygiene Projects-Tanzania

My professional journey has been profoundly shaped by my experience as a volunteer, a source of immense pride. I held a conviction that this path would eventually lead me to my desired destination, and that belief proved to be well-founded. Volunteering introduced me to a diverse group of individuals, including Tanzanian volunteers from varied cultural backgrounds and international volunteers. This was the first time I had the opportunity to work closely with them in person. 

I wholeheartedly encourage every young person seeking professional growth to recognize the tremendous potential within volunteering experiences. However, I also stress the importance of intentionality—know what you aim to gain from your volunteering engagement. 

My volunteering journey commenced with Raleigh Tanzania, in 2017, on their Water, Sanitation, and Hygiene (WaSH) program. There are many more volunteers I've had the privilege of meeting during my time volunteering with Raleigh Tanzania on various Water, Sanitation, and Hygiene projects. However, their stories and experiences will be covered in a different blog. As a part of the UK Government's ICS program, this initiative engaged international volunteers from teh UK in collaboration with Tanzanian counterparts, forming teams of 14-16 individuals to address critical challenges. The primary goal of this project centered on enhancing clean water and sanitation accessibility at Darajani Primary School and the surrounding community, situated in Mwaya Village, Morogoro, Tanzania.

Here, I found myself alongside truly exceptional individuals who would later become not just colleagues but remarkable friends. This experience was the turning point in my professional career, setting its course in the water sector. 

My 2017 Raleigh Volunteer Team in Mwaya Village, Morogoro, Tanzania 

I consider myself fortunate because, despite being part of a diverse group for the first time, I formed deep connections with my fellow volunteers. In hindsight, it seems like these incredible friends, whom I

had known for only a few months, had an insight into my destiny six years later. As I revisit the feedback that my fellow volunteers wrote on my paper, their words now make perfect sense, possibly because I now have a better command of English than I did at the time they wrote those comments. Let me share a few quotes from the feedback: 

You're willing to push yourself far out of comfort zone to develop yourself. You're very self aware and I love your passion for life and your education. You're a calming, peaceful, genuine and present. Another one commented " [You're] very kind, caring, patient, excellent at English, calm, collected, very driven to reach your academic goals and you push yourself to develop further.

 Another one said 

 [You're] very kind, caring, patient, excellent at English, calm, collected, very driven to reach your academic goals and you push yourself to develop further.

 Okay, may be last one

You're a very caring, honest, thoughtful, and really nice person I ever. I met you at the school- Oscar with a red blanket! I am way glad to have met you -You have got questions to help us all stop, think and reflect of things. At the same time, you have a very good/high values which I admire about you. You're friendly plus speak to us when we have problems and all. Plus most of all, you're strong - you don't give up! 

 Since 2017, I've had the privilege of reconnecting with some of these remarkable individuals on various occasions. In 2020, while pursuing my Masters in the UK, I had the fortunate opportunity to reunite with a few of them, three years after our volunteering journey in Tanzania. Despite the challenges posed by the Covid-19 pandemic, these friends played a pivotal role in easing my transition to life in the UK. Their presence made adapting to various aspects, including the culture, education system, transportation, and even everyday activities like shopping, much smoother. Meeting them in person also rekindled our cherished memories, creating an incredibly fulfilling experience.

 

On the left is my dear friend, Mohamed, who visited me in Leeds and graciously introduced me to his hometown, Bradford. On the right, you'll find my two wonderful friends, Ella and Clare, whom I had the pleasure of meeting in London. If you look closely you will see these individuals in the previous picture.

 These individuals infused me with an indescribable confidence. We all require such people who can speak so positively and openly about our character. It's an incredible experience that elevates us in numerous ways. It's essential to possess self-belief and continue even when such attention is scarce, but it's even more uplifting when others recognize and commend our strengths. I cannot stress enough the importance of staying true to oneself, as it paves the way for the right people to gravitate toward us.

 I'll conclude here for now, knowing that many have been eagerly waiting to read this. I look forward to continuously updating with new stories about the remarkable people in my life. This marks my first solo blog post, and I'm confident that future posts will only improve. I'll explore the topics I'm passionate about and can discuss intelligently talk about. Thank you for taking the time to read this, and please continue visiting. Your support means a lot.

Sincerely, 

Oscar Balongo